On Being Particular.

"Those who get to know me a little bit closer might be aware on how particular I am. I am very particular with the past, and I couldn't get any better than letting them passed. I am very particular with one's facial expression, one's pretentious smile, one's familiar gesture that I found spreading too much power. I am very particular with the women you remember, once you've loved and hoped things could lasted forever. I am very particular with colors and shapes, one that allies with white lies, or any other shades that covering both of your sleepy eyes. I am very particular with us — not that you know, not that you understand, not that you care. But I am very particular on that, on how you bid goodbye, and how particular things float in the sky as if none of us matter anymore."

(2017)

Please, Be Ready.

If there’s anything that I would like to address to my dear self, I would go by telling her to clear out the intention of her decision of leaving. As the leader of herself, I would highlight the best and the worst of her so that she knows the quality that she could use when she embarks into the near future — aside from the unnecessary traits that might burn her bridges. I would tell her to be careful of the freedom, for it comes with consequences and she gotta be ready to bear each of them. But also, I would tell her to be brave and never fear the risk of failing. Because at some point failure is the best teacher and nothing else does it better.

Be persistent, my dear. I love you enough to let you rise in the morning thinking of what alphabet to draw or what’s swinging on your random creative string. I imagine you wake up early and fueling your energy at your bamboo backyard, letting the nature to take charge of your inner spring. I would like to see you dedicate your time to what makes you happier and stronger, so people around you would get energized as much as you do. I would like to see you fall in love in the spread of new possibilities, new thoughts, better artworks, and be acknowledge of something you ace for.

I would love to be you, immerse within you, intertwined into someone who never stop learning and always be ready to expand organically because of your passion that grows forever in you. I wish the day will come sooner for you to embrace. And when the time comes, please be ready.